Jokes and Pickup lines

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

2. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day. But I couldn’t find any.

3. My friend’s bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.

4. I used to be a banker but I lost interest.

5. Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She ran away from the ball.

6. A book just fell on my head. I’ve only got myshelf to blame.

7. Why did the students eat their homework? Because the teacher said that it was a piece of cake.

8. I changed my password to “incorrect”. So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say “Your password is incorrect”.

9. What travels around the world but stays in one corner? A stamp.

10. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.

11. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

12. It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.

13. They say you are what you eat, so stay away from the nuts

14. What does a skeleton orders at a restaurant? Spare ribs.

15. I’m glad I know sign language, it’s pretty handy.

Nicolette (2U)